Reasons for Sex

If your Indian, your thankful for three things. Cricket, Aishwarya Rai, and the Kama Sutra. I would say in a nutshell, those three things help identify us. However, the one thing Indians can really hang their hat on, is the fact that while most major religions in the world tend to diminish the importance of sex, we praise it. In fact, we praise it so much, that to help the retarts that can't figure it out we made an instruction manual called the Kama Sutra. Now you may be wondering what does this have to do with anything? Well, I recently came across this article which goes on to explain the benefits of sex, and 5 good reasons to get your freak on today. Being the guy that I am, I thought I'd share these 5 reasons with you, and then share my own 5 reasons.

Their Reasons:

1. Sex boosts your immune system
They claim "A startling number of physicians are now recognizing how sexual and emotional health affect our entire well being". I'm guessing these were the dorks in Med school who couldn't get laid, and are now off getting busy with the hot Pharmaceutical Sales Reps and discovering this for the first time.

2. Sex burns calories
This may be true, but not if your on the bottom. According to them "A mere 30-minutes of sex burns 90 calories". I'm guessing they surveyed a senior citizen home if this is the case.

3. Sex relieves pain
"Orgasm is one serious narcotic!" They claim "sex can reduce pain, swelling, and inflammation associated with arthritis, headaches and menstrual cramps." I claim, that if you don't do it right, there is also a good chance that it can have the opposite effect.

4. Sex decreases aging
They say "“Use it or lose it” has never been more applicable. Regular sex releases a plethora of “happy” chemicals into your bloodstream, including testosterone." I say, cool.

5. Sex is great for depression
I can see the ad now, "Where does depression hurt?" There can be a guy pointing to his pecker saying, "Depression hurts here". Then a voiceover can tell you about how sex treats depression, and a long ass message that says "side effects may include an urge to cuddle, a need to smoke, funky yet seductive body odor, and birth".

Although these are good reasons, in the words of T-mobile, I've got "my-five":

1. Sex can help you get a promotion
There is no question you perform better at work when your less stressed, and more relaxed. If you don't believe me, hire a prostitute than start your next project and tell me if you don't see the difference in productivity and performance.

2. Sex can bring peace to the world
I'm thoroughly convinced that if all just started sexually experimenting with people from other cultures we'd find that we all have a lot more in common than not. I mean seriously, if we all just embraced the bodies of other cultures than I think we can definitely get over our differences because I'm pretty sure we'd find that when all is said and done, we like to get our freak on and that is something to build on.

3. Sex is good for your self confidence
Let's face it, being naked can sometimes be a nervous experience. However, if you've got someone else whose also naked (assuming most people take all their clothes off during sex), it can help you feel good about yourself. You may begin to wonder "Hey, I am the freakin man. Not only is she naked with me, but I get to violate her. Gee, I must be special".

4. Sex can make you a better poker player
Chris Rock once said "Just because I'm going, don't mean you made me go". I'll be honest, I've cleaned it up a bit, but the point is simple. Just because your having sex with one person, don't mean you can't pretend its someone else. In fact, engaging in this type of behaviour will really help out your poker game. You can make an honest face, and tell the other person they are amazing, and meanwhile you were thinking of Brad Pitt or Adriana Lima, and this can help you improve your poker face. Before you know it, your friends and lovers won't know the difference between your bluff when you go all in, or your bluff when your in the bedroom.

5. Sex can turn you into a model
If there is one thing about sex, its that during the act people make some odd ass faces. However, while these faces are being made they think they are sexy or cool or even provocative. Its kind of like the face my white friend Chris makes when dancing. However, there is a benefit to this. The more you have sex, the "cooler" your many looks and faces can become. Combine this with the rigorous cardio workout your having, and you may end up turning into a model who can make the run-way face and still look cool. However, just remember, practice makes perfect.

In general, if your still looking for reasons to have sex, than I suggest you get rid of your Nintendo Wii and join the rest of humanity.