We are getting to that time of year when families start to come together. This week its the Indian festival of lights, known as Diwali being celebrated by brown people all over the world. They will clog their arteries and allow cavities to thrive with their sugar filled sweets that are made from ghee (melted butter). Of course these sweets will satisfy the soul, and send Indian spirits flying high. Its in times like these when families will enjoy each others company, and the kids will enjoy the $11 they get from everyone's feet they manage to touch. Its a special time. We put aside our differences for those few moments, and take part in the beautiful festivities of Diwali. We light fireworks, we eat to our heart's content, and of course we have fashion shows and dance competitions.
Diwali has turned into the biggest excuse in the world for Indians to borrow clothes, and walk down a run-way in front of their college peers and friends. For those Indians who can dance, this is their chance to show their stuff. This is their golden moment, to get up on stage and show that even though we wear traditional Indian outfits, we know how to re-mix our songs to hip-hop beats and bust a move that is anything but traditional. At this time of year, college campuses all across the country are filled with hormone-raged college kids that are bossing each other around and trying to figure out what the coolest bhangra step is that they can use into their dance routine. They are hitting up all the malls, and buying the most expensive clothes they can find. They are carefully wearing these clothes in such a way so that the price tag is not seen, and the clothes can be returned after the show is over. But most importantly, they are attacking the streets of the Indian markets to see if they can sucker a business owner to sponsor them. They will explain that their student body comprises of hundreds of students who will never leave campus, but will get exposure to their store that is a 30 mile drive away from campus.
Why do we do this you ask? For one reason, and one reason alone. The Afterparty. That's right. If you are an Indian in college, the Diwali show after-party is the cafeteria talk of the following week. Its where you find out who was dumb enough to wear the fashion-show clothes to the club, and had a drink spilled on their outfit, and will now have to actually purchase the ridiculous thing they intended to return. Its where the boy who was partnered up with a girl for a dance at the show will actually have enough liquid courage to actually grind on her in a crowded dance floor. But most importantly, the main topic of discussion will be the throngs of people that did not get in because when the bouncer asked to make a straight line, they didn't know what that meant. Last but not least, it is the venue where the girl who really didn't like the song that the group picked for the dance gets to bitch about it and start a fight. Aaah yes, the Diwali Show After party is also where the high-school kids with fake IDs get in and try to grind with drunk college chicks. In their own way, it is a festival of lights you might say.
In conclusion, there is one thing that Indians love to do more than anything else, and that is celebrate. Our entire culture revolves around celebration. When god came to earth we celebrate, when he leaves we celebrate, and to remember all the milestones accomplished in between we celebrate. Its just now, in the 21st century, massive prayers have been replaced with Diwali Shows that try to "fuse" the American and Indian cultures. Its is not too uncommon to see an Indian person wearing traditional clothes dancing to an Indian song, which eventually gets remixed into a Lil' John Song, and the dance moves turn into something you'd see on BET at night. Our ancestors, would truly be jealous.
Showing posts with label celebration. Show all posts
Showing posts with label celebration. Show all posts
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Indian Wedding Receptions
Last night I had the good fortune of attending an Indian Wedding Reception with Mr. Umerica. Its quite an event, and is always lots of fun. The MC is usually doing a good job of getting the crowd involved, the food is spicy and abundant, and the drinks are flowin. However, the wedding reception I attended was for a religous couple who both came from religous families and therefore the event was dry. Now, I know what your thinking.....and no I did not sneak anything into the party. However, I thought I'd highlight some common events that happen at Indian wedding receptions and how its different when you contrast a dry wedding versus a boozed up wedding:
COCKTAIL HOUR:
Dry Wedding
People are usually drinking their Shirly Temples or Virgin Pina Coladas. They are eating the food, and generally having a good time.
Boozed-up Wedding
People are hovering around a bar like flies do on a recently dead squirrel. They refuse to leave the bar and invite every person who walks by them to join them at the bar. Lots of Liver poisoning is conducted, then when they get the drunchies (drunken munchies) they attack the food. They then go back to the bar for a cool down drink, but by then they’re told its closed, and they try to bribe the bartender for one last drink.
INTRODUCTIONS
Dry Wedding
People politely clap, and patiently wait for all 18 members of the immediate family to come out, and then give a standing ovation to the newly married couple.
Boozed-up Wedding
People start yelling and hollering at the grandma and grandpa who first walk in and thank them for having the grand-kids to throw a festive celebration. After the other 18 members of the family arrive they jump, scream, and yell into a thunderous applause for the newly married couple. They yell inappropriate things like “Yeah Raj, hit that for life playa!”
RANDOM PICTURES
Dry Wedding
People usually pose with babies and relatives/friends they don’t usually get to see.
Boozed-up Wedding
People will start posing for pictures even if they don’t know who you are. Usually a very sexy model face, or a peace sign will be involved. If it’s a big group you can bet 2 guys will be squatting in the front like they’re posing to be on the cover of a rap album.
DANCING
Dry Wedding
The DJ will usually do a good job and get everyone involved. People will usually gather around the bride and groom, and may even pick the lucky couple up on their shoulders for a bit.
Boozed-up Wedding
The drunken crowd will all be dancing like hooligans. Occasionally the DJ may play some reggaetone or Lil’ John. This will lead to people in their 30’s screaming “What! Yeah! Okayyy!”. Then the same people will begin grinding inappropriately in their Indian formal wear. At some point someone will carry the bride and the groom and try to see who can toss which person higher into the air.
DINNER
Dry Wedding
People will wait in line patiently. They will make small talk and discuss how delicious the spread looks. They may even make an extra dish for their grandparent so that person does not have to get up and wait in line.
Boozed-up Wedding
People will usually be too drunk and dancing into the moment to notice dinner is being served. Occasionally they may stop dancing to make song requests to the DJ. Also, at this time the single folks will start making their move on any potentials at the reception. They’ll do something smooth like go up to a group of women and yell “SHOTS! WHOSE WITH ME!”
Eventually they do get hungry and attack the buffet line like Michael Jackson would attack a kindergarten class.
THE END OF THE NIGHT
Dry Wedding
People usually congratulate the couple once again. They find their families and head home after a long day.
Boozed-up Wedding
People usually find the closest bar or club that will still serve them booze. If there is none close by the bride/groom usually have arrangements made in a hotel room that is stocked for the party to continue. At about 2:30 AM its no longer cute to sit around with the newly married couple and they will kick everyone out.
I should also mention, that although there are religous families that have wonderful weddings, these families usually have a few degenerate friends or family members. In such occasions these people will setup what I like to call a "car bar". Usually the uncle who owns a liquor store will bring his mini-van packed with beers, and scotch. These leads to some unusual moments such as when the name of an uncle is called to walk out, and he's trying to chug the beer in the parking lot, but this explains the "pep" in his step.
To all of you who are getting married - Congratulations! To all of you in attendance, I hope you enjoy these random observations.
COCKTAIL HOUR:
Dry Wedding
People are usually drinking their Shirly Temples or Virgin Pina Coladas. They are eating the food, and generally having a good time.
Boozed-up Wedding
People are hovering around a bar like flies do on a recently dead squirrel. They refuse to leave the bar and invite every person who walks by them to join them at the bar. Lots of Liver poisoning is conducted, then when they get the drunchies (drunken munchies) they attack the food. They then go back to the bar for a cool down drink, but by then they’re told its closed, and they try to bribe the bartender for one last drink.
INTRODUCTIONS
Dry Wedding
People politely clap, and patiently wait for all 18 members of the immediate family to come out, and then give a standing ovation to the newly married couple.
Boozed-up Wedding
People start yelling and hollering at the grandma and grandpa who first walk in and thank them for having the grand-kids to throw a festive celebration. After the other 18 members of the family arrive they jump, scream, and yell into a thunderous applause for the newly married couple. They yell inappropriate things like “Yeah Raj, hit that for life playa!”
RANDOM PICTURES
Dry Wedding
People usually pose with babies and relatives/friends they don’t usually get to see.
Boozed-up Wedding
People will start posing for pictures even if they don’t know who you are. Usually a very sexy model face, or a peace sign will be involved. If it’s a big group you can bet 2 guys will be squatting in the front like they’re posing to be on the cover of a rap album.
DANCING
Dry Wedding
The DJ will usually do a good job and get everyone involved. People will usually gather around the bride and groom, and may even pick the lucky couple up on their shoulders for a bit.
Boozed-up Wedding
The drunken crowd will all be dancing like hooligans. Occasionally the DJ may play some reggaetone or Lil’ John. This will lead to people in their 30’s screaming “What! Yeah! Okayyy!”. Then the same people will begin grinding inappropriately in their Indian formal wear. At some point someone will carry the bride and the groom and try to see who can toss which person higher into the air.
DINNER
Dry Wedding
People will wait in line patiently. They will make small talk and discuss how delicious the spread looks. They may even make an extra dish for their grandparent so that person does not have to get up and wait in line.
Boozed-up Wedding
People will usually be too drunk and dancing into the moment to notice dinner is being served. Occasionally they may stop dancing to make song requests to the DJ. Also, at this time the single folks will start making their move on any potentials at the reception. They’ll do something smooth like go up to a group of women and yell “SHOTS! WHOSE WITH ME!”
Eventually they do get hungry and attack the buffet line like Michael Jackson would attack a kindergarten class.
THE END OF THE NIGHT
Dry Wedding
People usually congratulate the couple once again. They find their families and head home after a long day.
Boozed-up Wedding
People usually find the closest bar or club that will still serve them booze. If there is none close by the bride/groom usually have arrangements made in a hotel room that is stocked for the party to continue. At about 2:30 AM its no longer cute to sit around with the newly married couple and they will kick everyone out.
I should also mention, that although there are religous families that have wonderful weddings, these families usually have a few degenerate friends or family members. In such occasions these people will setup what I like to call a "car bar". Usually the uncle who owns a liquor store will bring his mini-van packed with beers, and scotch. These leads to some unusual moments such as when the name of an uncle is called to walk out, and he's trying to chug the beer in the parking lot, but this explains the "pep" in his step.
To all of you who are getting married - Congratulations! To all of you in attendance, I hope you enjoy these random observations.
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