Arranged Marriages

"Dude, how can you marry someone without knowing them?" If you're Indian, and you grew up in America, there is a good chance that at some point in your life, a friend of yours that is not Indian may have asked you this question, and legitimately so. Even if you are Indian, the concept of Arranged Marriage is pretty freaky. The idea of having to spend the rest of your life with someone you never met before can be quite daunting. What I find hilarious, is that in today's day and age people simply try to make the whole thing out to be something that is common and not a big deal. Just take a look at this ad below:





They encourage you to "Discover love, in an arranged marriage". Let me be the first to say, "What the fuck are you talking about?" Telling someone to "discover love" in an arranged marriage, is kind of like telling someone to discover the price of their new car after they've bought it. To me, having an arranged marriage is kind of like buying a car without knowing the price. There is a chance that after you buy it under the hood can be a great v12 engine, or there is a chance that you are left with a piece of crap that will not work, and you will have to pay for it the rest of your life.

People who really "believe" in the arranged marriage system, will tell you all these statistics about how people who got married this way tend to stay together. In my opinion, there are lies, damn lies, and there are statistics. Once again, if you bought a brand new car and got ripped off, there is a good chance that you are gonna tell all your buddies about how much you love your car and you won't admit to them how much you got ripped off. I think when it comes to arranged marriages, it probably works the same way. If you married someone that lays around like a sack of potatoes in bed during sex, doesn't contribute to the income, and is a constant pain in your ass, you will probably tell your friends she's a freak in the sack, "finishing up" med school, and has dinner waiting for you when you get home.

I'm not saying arranged marriages can't work, I'm simply saying that people tend to exaggerate how well they work. I know plenty of people who met through the arranged marriage system and are happy, and I know plenty who have been burned. All I'm saying, is that you will have a better idea of what your getting yourself into if you test drive it first.

Warming Up For The Next Lover

We all travel through life falling in and out of love. For some, it can be a vicious cycle that repeats often, and others only go through it once. Some are even lucky enough to find their true love the first time they meet, and don't even know what it means to fall "out". Its a punishing, and beautiful thing which helps us understand the world, and more importantly ourselves. Some try to put a number on how many times it may happen, and call it destiny or fate, and others well they just understand that what's gotta happen, is gonna happen.

However, there is something that is quite ironic about this entire process. Its not something we like to talk about often, and of course I would like to take this opportunity to do just that. I recently saw a cartoon that reminded me of this strange paradox. The truth is very simply, that each time we go into a relationship we grow more as a person. We make mistakes, and we learn from those mistakes. The kicker, is that the next person who comes along is the one who benefits. So for example, if you were impatient when your girlfriend was getting ready, and always got mad or through a fit, your current girlfriend has to put up with it. However, after that relationship is over, the next girl who comes along will be fortunate enough to have a guy whose not so impatient and gives her the time she needs to get ready.

Does nobody else but me find this nuts! Think about it. You will always be a better person in your next relationship! I find this hilarious and humbling at the same time. Its also the reason why when a guy starts dating a girl for the first time and she does something amazing in bed and drives him wild, he thoroughly enjoys it. Then he begins to wonder.....how did she learn how to do that? Who was the bastard before you who taught her that? Which usually ends to a pointless argument. Of course, as "fate" would have it, this is something the next girl he dates won't have to deal with.

So go on. Do what you gotta do. Date all types of people. Pretty ones, crazy ones, and of course my favorite the horny ones. Learn what you gotta learn. At some point, you might be lucky to find a person who has learned just as much as you, and knows just as much as you, and has been through just as much as you. If you ever find that person at the right time, I guess you might then know what love is.