Butter Face

I happen to work for a global company, and one of the coolest parts of doing so is meeting colleagues from all over the world and discussing cultural differences. Just recently I was in Mumbai for a global meeting. These meetings can often be quite lengthy and require a lot of patience and perseverance. Afterwards, all the team members from outside of India get together to unwind at the hotel bar called Bombay High. Of course when men are away from their homes and their wives the natural thing to talk about is women. I was their at around 11 PM with a colleague from the States, and another from our Brazilian office in Sao Paulo.

We were sipping on some Australian Shiraz and discussing the day's activities and progress that we'd made. Then for some reason my American colleague asks me "So Nirav, in your opinion how do Indian women compare to the rest of the world?" I replied "You see, for a long time there was a difference in who had money and who did not. As a result the women were either extremely beautiful and exotic looking, or they looked like a big toe. However, now we have an expanding middle class which is producing many women who are not on either end of the spectrum. I guess in America they'd be considered cute or pretty but not that hot".

So then my American colleague turns to the Bazilian colleague (who is from Hyderabad and raised in India, but now lives in Brazil) and asks so tell me about the women in Brazil. "As you know, many of these women are beautiful, and go on to become models and actresses. However, there is a huge population of women who are beautiful from the neck down". My American coworker turns to him and states "You know, in America we have a saying for that." "Oh really?" responds the Brazilian. "And what is that saying?" To which the American proudly explains "In America we call them Butter-Faces". "What? You mean like toast and butter? How does that make sense?" To which I go on to explain "you see when everything is good on her but her face, we tend to call those women butter-faces just to make things simpler. For example that waitress that just walked by would be what I consider a butter-face." I look to my American companion for a second opinion and I get the confirmation that I needed along with a dirty smile.

"Wow! That really is a simple and accurate way of seeing things" explains the Brazilian. To which I respond "In America, there is no other way". However, I believe that we had given him way too much power since for the rest of the trip he kept pulling me aside and asking butterface? To which I usually responded "Yes, buddy. But you don't have to tell me every time. There's a billion people in this country you can spend the rest of your days doing this!"