He was excited. He had no idea what lay ahead of him. Raj had always dreamed of coming to America and it was finally about to happen. He was so excited about the buildings, the cultures, his new co-workers, and of course the women. See, living in India besides from what he read on the
internet all he knew of America was Baywatch and
McDonalds. He had spent all of his life studying and working in India, and never really thought he'd be working or living in America. However, he was working for a company that had an office in the States. Raj had performed exceptionally well, in fact he performed so well that the US Office wanted him there, and he got an opportunity to go.
He was sad. How could a person who has only lived with his parents and never even gone outside his home state in India, ever survive in a country like America? Then he thought to himself, Baywatch &
McDonalds, that is how I will get by. One day while going about his business, his boss called him into his office. "Raj, you've been performing really well, and we want to send you to America. You will be given a place to live there, and a salary which will be paid in Dollars. What do you think about that?" An immediate grin was plastered on his face, and he was so full of excitement, he could barely manage to say the words "That sounds like a good opportunity". In reality, he was thinking "
Aray Vah! America, I am
COMMMING!" He left his boss's office and pointed his 2 fingers in the air and did a fake
bhangra move before walking back to his desk. He was so full of excitement he couldn't do any work for the rest of the day. He had grand visions of being on the beach and rescuing women in bikinis from the silver waters of the Pacific, who returned the favor to him in his favorite way. A smile and
druel were interrupted when his boss came by and dropped a stack of papers on his desk saying, "I need this done by the end of today, and I will discuss what we talked about tomorrow after the meeting with you". He quickly finished the task at hand, and went off to his big dreams. Later that day he came home from work, and explained the big news to his folks. They were happy for him. The kind of happiness a father feels when he gives his daughter away at a wedding. They knew it was for the best, but they knew nothing would ever be the same.
The next day Raj came into the office, with a somber state of mind. He was incredibly excited, and unbelievably sad knowing that he may have to leave this life he had known forever. His boss then gave him the news. The company would shift him to the US, and pay for his apartment for 6 months, and give him a car to help him get around. He would be leaving in 2 weeks time. He spent those two weeks shopping for warm clothes, and saying goodbye to his closest friends and family. It was not easy, but it was exciting. It was the same type of excitement a high school student might feel on graduation day. When the day came, Raj bowed down and touched the feet of all his elders, with the utmost respect and showed complete gratitude for his culture and religion. He left some extra money at the temple for good luck in his new venture and went to the airport. He had never flown before, so to find out he was a business-class passenger was a beautiful thing.
The air hostesses were beautiful, the people were friendly, and the alcohol was delicious and free. Johnny Walker Blue Label helped Raj fall into a deep sleep. He slept like a child. When he awoke, he was somewhere close to New York. Then the pilot announced the local temperature was 32 degrees Fahrenheit. Just like that all the visions of Baywatch and Pamela Anderson instantly disappeared. "All I have now is
McDonalds" Raj thought to himself. When he landed in New York, a car was waiting for him. The driver's name was Carter, and he was quite the talkative person. He thought to himself how great this was going to be. He got to his apartment and he was astonished to have a huge 2-bedroom townhouse all to himself. He soon realized that he could walk around naked and no one would care, because he's the only one home. As he was
un-packing and strolling about with nothing on, the door bell rang. He was freaked! He threw on some shorts and a t-shirt, and another guy was at the door. As Raj opened the door, Nick walked in with his bags. "Nice to meet you buddy, I'm Nick. I've recently been hired and we are sharing this 2-bedroom townhouse for 6 months I believe". Just like that the nudist colony became a formal place.
On his first day of work, Raj was blown away. He couldn't believe how tight the clothes were on all the women. There are times when a man arrives at a place, and he feels an instant connection. There are times when he does not. That connection, for some reason just makes everything feel "right". This was one of those times. This country, and this company gave Raj a feeling he hadn't felt in a really long time. Unfortunately after meeting Heather the receptionist, the feeling he felt was also in his pants, and Raj had to quickly excuse himself. After meeting everyone and making his way to his desk, Raj began to get familiar with his job requirements, and what was expected of him. He thought to himself, I will be focused, and I will work harder than everyone. That state of mind lasted a whole week. He found it incredibly hard to be this way with Nick goofing around right next to him all the time. Nick was always flirting with women on the phone and being a bit obnoxious. Ironically, this didn't bother Raj. Being the quiet one his whole life, Raj admired Nick's "free-flowing" attitude.
Then the day came, which changed Raj forever. Up to this point, Raj was always quiet and kept his thoughts to himself. However, on this day Heather was wearing something that was out right provocative. Raj couldn't contain it. She walked by, and Raj made a small noise under his breath. The kind of noise you would make if you were constipated. He was sure no one had heard. Unfortunately Nick started cracking up laughing. Raj quickly blushed and said "
Neeck, you know, sometimes these things I cannot control. Did you see Heather today? She is looking too nice. When she is walking like this, I cannot control my desires sometimes". Nick knew the perfect solution. "Raj my friend, I am taking you tonight to a place where you don't have to hold in your desires". After dinner Nick, Raj, and few other co-workers showed up to a gentleman's club. Raj asked "What is a gentleman's club Nick? They have some drinks here?" "You will see my friend, they have a lot more than just drinks".
When Candy caressed Raj's thighs and took the dollar out his mouth in ways he never thought possible, he finally thought to himself "I have arrived". Forget about Baywatch &
McDonalds, this is the real American Dream! After a couple of hours in there Nick was ready to head back home. Raj was no where to be found. Finally Nick found him, "Raj, we have to go, you can't spend all your money here". Clearly intoxicated with lust and alcohol Raj replied "Why not? I can do whatever I want. No mummy, no daddy, only Raj. I will take one more dance, than we can go". Nick waited impatiently. Finally the two of them went home. The next day at work, Raj had a horrible headache and was late for his meeting. Finally at lunch time he opened up his wallet and only found receipts. He could not believe he spent $600 so quickly! At the same time, he didn't feel so bad, because he had more fun than he had in a very long time. When Friday came, Raj suggested they go back to the gentleman's club. Unfortunately, Nick was not up for it. So Raj gathered other coworkers and went back.
As time went on Raj became a usual at this establishment. He continued to make groaning noises on days when Heather dressed promiscuously. However, Nick knew that he created a monster. It was too late. Raj had a taste of American flesh and cheap perfume, and he was hooked. "Nick, we can go tonight
na?" "Na! You crazy bastard we can't! You can't!" he replied. Raj dismissed him, and Nick noticed that the people Raj was going with were the newbies from the Indian office. He finally realized one great truth about these guys from India. That is, that they are incredibly horny.
At that point he realized that while we were outsourcing to India, the Indians were outsourcing to us at the same time. It was a simple economic trade-off. Software for stage-dancers.