Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Shop 'Til You Drop

If you've ever been long enough with a girl, there is a good chance that she has asked you to go shopping with her. Some girls are quicker with their decision than others, but with any girl when you are shopping with her, it is an exercise of patience. You can't rush, you can't instigate, and you can never ever say "Are you finished?" You must assume the position. The position is, put on some comfortable sneakers, stick your arm out, and get ready to hold the purse while she puts on some outfits. The whole time, you will be receiving permiscuous looks from the other girls in the store because they see you are taken, and are all of a sudden worth a dirty smile or a jaded glance.

The easiest way to find a person who is in a store with his girlfriend is by the look of his face. Usually he has found a seat on the couch in the middle of the floor which is no where near anything. He has the look of defeat on his face, and his body language is simply sad. It doesn't matter what his nationality is, he simply looks like a lion that used to be full of energy and wild, and has now been caged by Macy's.

Therefore, to help guys out all over the world, the Indian Guy has the following suggestion for retailers of women's clothing:

1. Add a Sports Bar where all the boyfriends can hang out
2. Add a pole to all the dressing rooms, so guys can see what their girlfriends look like in the new underwear dancing.
3. Have a pole outside the dressing room, if any of the girls want to make a quick buck
4. Have an arcade
5. Setup a Texas Hold Em table so the guys can win some money to pay for the girlfriend's clothing.
6. Make the cash registers as close to the exit as possible to avoid any last minute "Oh, I didn't see this top earlier, I think its cute" decisions.
7. Have the people working the changing rooms hold the purses

I think the addition of these few little changes can make the experience more enjoyable for men all over. When a guy is at forever 21, and he sees another guy, he gives that look. The look that says "Oh you just got here? Been here for 45 minutes, and all she's picked out is this one top. We still haven't started the other sections. But I'm sure you'll have fun......SUCKER!"

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

u have no complains - b/c i know for sure that u weren't that guy in macys ! LoL :)

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